


if you need to, keep time on me

by tentatively



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: 2.04 coda, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Insecure Carlos, M/M, i watched that teaser and wrote a coda to that tarlos scene whoopsie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 07:47:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29221920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tentatively/pseuds/tentatively
Summary: “Are we breaking up?”It took all of TK’s strength to maintain a stoic face as Carlos posed the question, looking small, eyes darting away immediately after the words left his mouth.or,My take/coda to that teaser fox gave us and left us all very, very stressed.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Comments: 14
Kudos: 187





	if you need to, keep time on me

**Author's Note:**

> i watched the teaser yesterday but i had lots of work soooo i wrote it today!! i have a lot of feelings about that teaser nghh
> 
> i hope y'all enjoy :)
> 
> title is from fleet foxes' song of the same name

_“Are we breaking up?”_

It took all of TK’s strength to maintain a stoic face as Carlos posed the question, looking small, eyes darting away immediately after the words left his mouth.

 _If you care so much, why did you just break my heart then?_ TK’s brain weakly offered.

“I don’t know, Carlos, you tell me,” TK shot back, trying to sound level-headed, quite contrary to the storm brewing inside him.

Carlos visibly gulped, squeezing his eyes shut. TK allowed himself in, and striding inside Carlos’ apartment, he sat down on the couch. Every force inside him was yelling at him to just walk away, let Carlos pick up the pieces and fix what he had broken. But a mightier force took over his actions and he was unable to leave _. You’re going to stay. You’re going to stay and talk to him and face the truth._

“So, I’m your friend now?” TK questioned. Carlos was stood at a corner, unmoving. His lips were pressed together and his eyes looked so sad. Like he knew how deeply he had hurt TK, but also couldn’t find the right words to justify his actions. “Carlos, why did you not introduce me as your boyfriend?”

Carlos heaved out a breath. He opened his mouth as if to say something and then deciding against it, closed it. “Talk to me, ‘los. Weren’t you the one who was so set upon giving a name to this relationship even when I kept rebuffing you? What happened?” Then, in a softer whisper, “What changed?”

“Nothing changed, TK,” Carlos spoke, his first words since posing that heart-stabbing question. “Nothing changed, alright?” He rubbed his face with the palm of his hands and drew in a breath. “I love you. So much. _Fuck_ , TK, I love you so much that it’s scary sometimes.”

“What you just told your parents didn’t exactly reflect this sentiment,” TK asserted, angry, hurt, so, _so_ hurt. “What – am I not good enough for you to introduce to your parents? Is that it?”

“TK,” Carlos said, edging closer to where TK was seated. “No, no, _never_. Never _ever_ let that thought cross your mind, okay? That is the farthest thing from the truth. You are perfect and so much more than enough.” TK let out a small whimper of distress at those words. Goddamn, he was so _confused_. And _tired_. Carlos was being so fucking confusing. If he felt that way, why shove him away in that moment?

“So tell me,” TK croaked. _God, he was so close to breaking down_. “What is wrong? What happened? Why am I a friend before your parents? You’re out to your parents and they’re very supportive, so that’s obviously not it.”

Carlos looked miserable, like he wanted nothing more for this conversation to never take place. He detached his hands from TK and his gaze shifted down to his toes. “Please, Carlos,” TK almost pleaded, grabbing the man’s strong shoulders. “Tell me what I did –”

“I was scared, alright?” Carlos blurted out, cutting TK’s train of thoughts. “It was me. I was scared. It’s got nothing to do with you or your shortcomings. You’re perfect.”

“Scared – of what?”

“You really don’t know?” Carlos smiled at him, sadly, but there was no jab or menace it in. He wrapped his arms around himself as if shielding himself from something. “I – look. Like you said, I’ve always been the one who’s wanted to put a name to our relationship. Because TK, I knew – from the moment I met you, I knew, that I was going to fall hard.” Chuckling softly, he continued, “And boy did I fall hard. You kept pushing me away, which of course, you had very good reasons for – but TK –” Carlos buried his face in his hands again, muttering a soft _, I don’t know how to say this_ , and finally let the words out, “I didn’t introduce you as my boyfriend to my parents because I’m still not sure of how serious you are about me. I’m just scared that one day you’ll realize that you don’t want this and you’ll leave and move on and I’ll just...you know...” Carlos finally brought his gaze back to TK’s face. “Yeah.”

If TK thought he was about to break into tears earlier, he was definitely crying right now. But for a very different reason. Here he thought that yet another man was going to toss him away for never being enough, whereas the truth had been so very different. _Carlos_ was scared of him leaving, because of how he had kept him at a distance for quite a while, and he had lied to his parents about TK out of nothing but insecurity – a feeling so familiar to TK. Now that he thought about it, it did make a whole lot of sense.

“Carlos,” TK breathed, gripping the other man’s hands tightly. “I’m so sorry that I let you feel that way. Fuck, I’m so sorry that you ever thought I was going to _leave_ – I can’t believe I put you through the same kind of insecurity that I’m always scared of feeling. And here I thought this was about _your_ feelings for me – god, I can be really selfish sometimes, can’t I?”

Carlos shushed him gently, muttering a soft, “No, there’s no way you could’ve known. I – I should have spoken about these feelings earlier. I’m sorry too.”

“Yes, you should’ve told me, I will agree,” TK smiled his crinkly-eyed smile and pressed their foreheads together. “And Carlos? I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be yours for as long as you will have me.”

Carlos softly laughed, saying, “Then that’s going to be an awfully long time, baby. I don’t know if you believe in forever, but I for one, do.”

“I’m a bigger cheese than you’ll ever be,” TK smirked, narrowing his eyes challengingly. “The next time I see your parents, I hope you correct your mistake, Officer Reyes.”

Carlos returned the smirked, catching TK’s lips with his own, one hand casually caressing the firefighter’s jaw. “Sure will, my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so pumped for monday!!!
> 
> come scream about tarlos @ [my tumblr](https://yourstrulyhenry.tumblr.com)


End file.
